Sleepovers, Spiders and Stereotypes
by The Smiling Dead
Summary: One-Shot. Bella sleeps over at the Cullen's house. Inspired by an actual sleepover. Bella, Alice, Edward and Emmett. All Human. Pls R


**One-Shot. Please review.**

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Nobodies POV**

"Esme, can Bella sleep over tonight?" Alice looked up at her adoptive mother, pleading in her eyes. Alice had a way with getting what she wanted. All the time.

Bella stood by Charlie who was just as silent as herself. Neither Bella nor Charlie were big conservationists, which made Alice feel like she needed to take control. She was very good at it, too. A very fitting job, indeed.

Esme looked down at Alice, raising an eyebrow. It was a rule in her house that Alice wouldn't ask questions which would put her under pressure in front of her guests. That was practically the whole reason why Alice spoke at the time she did in the first place. She was going to get Bella to sleep over if it was the last thing she did.

**BPOV**

Alice is so controlling, it almost drives me freaking crazy. Almost.

I really couldn't be bothered to sleep over tonight. We had just spent a nice night at the Cullen's for dinner and Alice was pushing her luck. Esme was always so busy. It must be hard for her to always accommodate for family friends.

I mean, I would have denied the silent invitation but I really couldn't make my mind up. It was either go home and leave Esme and the family in peace, or stay and hang out with a certain brother of Alice's. No names.

I could tell that Esme was not sure how to take Alice's sudden outburst, but I wasn't going to say anything. I guess I had made up my mind. I was soon practically pleading as well.

"Umm," Was all she said.

I leant forward, waiting for her answer. I looked at Alice from the corner of my eye and I could tell that she was doing the same thing.

"Ok, sure."

I sighed in relief. Let the night begin.

**APOV**

"So Alice, where are the boys?" Bella said as Charlie had driven out of sight. I was so happy. I almost always got what I wanted. At least I wasn't losing my touch.

"Eh, I'm not sure at the moment." I hadn't seen them all day, actually. "Hang on I'll just check."

"EDWARD! EMMETT!" I screamed down the hallway. I saw Bella's pained expression and I laughed.

"What Bella? You know how loud I can be." I said, grinning. "EDWARD AND EMMETT! Don't be rude! We have company!"

"Yeah. I, eh, know that." She said, recovering from my more recent outburst. So not losing my touch. Hell yeah.

"You just know how I don't like attention," she said, nodding. I think to herself.

"Get over it Bella, attention is great!" I didn't know why I was so happy. I was still smiling like an idiot.

"Yeah. Right." She murmured but I chose to ignore it. She needed to open up a bit.

Edward came first and smiled when he saw Bella. Next came Emmett.

"So, where have you two been, huh?" I said, putting my hands on my hips and looking up at Edward then back and forth between the two.

"No – Nothing." Emmett said. "We were not playing video games."

God, he was bad at this.

Edward hit him over the back of the head, sighing. He really was an idiot.

"Well, Bella's here now, so you can't ok." I said, looking straight at Emmett. He was the worst offender when it came to playing games, and lying.

I looked at Bella and then to Edward before I looked back to a moving Emmett.

"Jeez Emmett, can't you stay in one place at a time. Stop trying to sneak back to your precious games. Tonight is going to be fun and you're all going to be joining in," I said, earning a sigh from Bella.

"And if you don't do what I say, I will seriously cut the hard wires from that stupid game box of yours!"

Emmet gasped in shock and looked at me with wide eyes. "You wouldn't."

He didn't know me at all.

**BPOV**

I looked over at Edward, catching his eye as we watched Alice and Emmett argue about his game box. I didn't get what guys saw in those kinds of entertainment. And, I kind of sucked at it anyway.

"Hey Bella." Edward said, turning to me as he let out a deep breath.

"Hey Edward."

I smiled to myself. This was what it was like whenever I saw Edward. We didn't go to the same school, so I only ever saw him when Charlie decided to visit Esme, or vice-versa. Me and Alice attended 'Forks Private High School for Girls', whilst Emmett, Edward and Alice's boyfriend, Jasper, went to our brother school, 'St. Spork Private School', (for boys) obviously. Don't even ask me how they came up with a name like that.

"How have your holidays been? You been up to much?" He asked next. This was Edward's kind of small talk. He kept things _real_ simple. He asked about what you've been up to at home and at school, nothing much else, but I liked it.

"Not much, really. I've been sitting at home, or rather, sleeping. Reading, watching TV, that kind of thing." I answered with a shrug of my shoulders. I hadn't been doing much at all. I get too lazy during winter.

Edward nodded, mostly likely understanding completely. But then again, I always got that from him.

"How about you?" I asked in turn.

"Eh, not too bad. Just stayin' at home, you know." I nodded. "And training."

Figures. Edward and Emmett played _heaps _of sport and were continuously training throughout the week. The only days off they had were Fridays and Sundays. I could never do something as obsessive like that.

It was silent for a while before Alice came back, seen as though neither of us had anything to say.

"Anyway, guys," Alice said, a sad Emmett behind her. "Bella and I are going to set up for bed. We're sleeping in the rumpus room, so don't disturb us. Kay?"

She asked the boys, but Edward had already started walking away.

"Can I sleep in the room with you guys too?" Emmett asked loudly. "It's the only room with an X-Box which you haven't cut the wires off of!"

His face went sad again. No wonder where the two had gone off to. Alice had probably won over.

"Maybe. Fine, but you need to ask Edward if he wants to as well." She said, sighing.

"Are you kidding, I'm only staying if is. But yea, sure. I'll make sure he will."

With that, Emmett skipped off – yes, skipped – calling for 'Eddie'.

"Ok. What now?" I asked Alice.

She smiled at me, taking my hand and pulling me towards the room.

**Emmett's POV**

"Eddie!"

I stopped as I came to his room, and knocked lightly with no answer.

"Eddie, where are you?"

"Don't call me Eddie, Emmett." A muffled voice came from inside the room and I knew Edward was inside. I let myself in.

"What's up man? Where sleeping with the girls tonight!" I was practically cheering, with my hands in the air. I stopped waving, realising how that came out.

Edward, however, was laughing, his head looking up at me from the pillow, chuckling deeply.

"Oh. My bad man. Don't tell Rose I said that, okay?"

Rose would kill me, even for a mistake like that. She's really protective for some reason. I thought that was supposed to be my job. Any guy would be lucky to have her. I'm just glad it's me.

"Emmett?" Edward was looking at me, not laughing this time.

"What?" I said realising I wasn't listening.

"I said, why are we sleeping in the same room with the girls? Why would Alice agree to something like that anyway?"

"Like I know man. The fact is that she said yes, so who cares with the questions!" I was getting too jumpy again. Jeez, I'm a man. Calm yourself, Emmett. "So, you comin'?"

Edward considered it for a moment before looking up at me again. What's wrong with this guy. I would have said 'yes' in a heartbeat!

"Yeah. 'Kay man."

**3 Hours later...**

**BPOV**

"But I can't even play those games anyway!" I said looking at Emmett seriously. He was offering me the remote-thing but I was refusing for the fourth time now. Guys really don't get the point.

"Who the _hell_, can't play Viva Piñata? Give me one person who can't and it can't be yourself." Emmett looked at me, whilst Edward and Alice were laughing at my refusal.

"Me! That's who." I said simply.

"I said you can't choose yourself, Bella!" Emmett said frowning as if he didn't understand a joke. "That's cheating that is."

"Why are we even playing this anyway!?" I said giggling, turning to Alice who was still on the floor laughing.

Soon enough, we were all on the floor laughing.

"Hi girls." Carlisle stood at the door waving. "And guys."

His face scrunched up in confusion and we started laughing again.

"Hi Carlisle."

"Hey dad." The three Cullen's said in unison, smirking at his facial expression. It was somewhat between laughter and confusion. A great mix. "Have a good day at work?"

Edward asked.

"Sure. It was good. I can see that your all enjoying yourselves." At that, Carlisle looked at his watch. "But it's almost one in the morning and Edward you have training tomorrow. You either leave and get some rest or you can all say goodnight and continue this tomorrow morning, or afternoon by the looks of it."

We all sighed and looked at Edward, seeing what he would do.

"Common Eddie, looks like you're going to bed by yourself tonight." Alice said, patting Edward on the back, almost expecting him to move, but he didn't.

"No! He can't leave, 'cause that would make me leave!" Emmett pipe up and Carlisle left the room to leave us to figure it out. "And Bella, I secretly know you want him to stay as well!"

I laughed uncomfortably, knowing that it was true. "Yeah. Sure Emmett, I don't mind if you stay Edward." I said turning to him.

"M'Kay." He said lazily, back.

Alice walked over to the light switch in defeat and we sat in silence for a while before I was hit by something soft across my stomach.

"Ow!"

I heard someone laugh and I was hit again. That was most defiantly Emmett.

"Damnit Emmett, stop it." I moaned. "You're so annoying."

I shouldn't have said that.

"Oops." Alice said.

Then, I was attacked. Two pillows were attacking me at both sides and I was squealing, moving around to avoid the hits. Emmett was way too strong.

I looked up and realised who was hitting me. Alice had joined in, but no Edward.

"Edward," I moaned before being hit again. "Help me!"

I'm guessing he was trying to get to sleep, well I decided to believe that, which meant he _didn't _make a move to help me.

I silently growled.

The pillows stopped hitting me and I was instantly happy again. But then two arms wrapped around me and threw me across the room, and I hit something soft, not the floor. It was a bed which I rolled backwards, thanks to the momentum, and landed on something, or someone. I looked up at a sleepy Edward as I lay in his arms and almost laughed at myself. He wasn't wearing a shirt. Funny how things work out, huh?

But still, he didn't say anything. What is this? Edward-doesn't talk- day! God, I hate the world!

"So – Sorry." I stuttered moving away. I instantly regretted the action, wanting to be lying next to him again. Stupid Emmett. Stupid Edward.

The two pillow hitting bullies laughed at me and gave each other high fives.

"You know what, I'm _really _tired." I said, stretching and lying back down on my own bed. "Goodnight."

"Common Bella, don't be like that." Alice said, sitting next to me.

"No. I'm serious. I'm _unbelievably_ tired. I think I need to sleep." I put on my best serious voice, faked a yawn and turned over pulling the covers over my head again, only to be pulled away, again, by an angry Alice.

"Fine." She said, and walked away.

I sat up.

"Did you really disrupt my almost-sleep by pulling away my covers to tell me... _that_? Fine? What do you mean?" I was confused.

"Oh... nothing." I looked at Emmett and then at Edward, who was still trying to sleep. I can't believe he's not fazed by any of this, then back to Alice's covered figure.

I crawled across the beds towards the lump and pulled down her covers so I could see her face. "What did you mean?"

She was avoiding my gaze. I can't deal with Alice when she's grumpy; it's too much trouble to get her happy again. It usually consists of doing something which I don't really want to do.

Instead of looking at me, she got up and walked through the door to Carlisles study, towards the bathroom next door. Next thing I knew we heard a loud scream and Alice came running back into the room.

"There's a spider in hallway!" She was practically hugging onto me. I knew how scared of spiders she was, and she knew how scared I was as well.

"Well, what do you want me to do about it, huh?" I shrugged my shoulders, adding some emphasis. "You know how much _I _hate spiders too!"

I don't think she was listening to me at this point as she was making her way over to Emmett who was lying on his chest trying to sleep as well. Weird, Emmett never slept whenever I was over.

"Eemmeettt..." Alice cooed. "Can you come kill the big spider for Bella and me?" She said with a smile, as Emmett looked up at her in protest.

He made a loud noise as his face collapsed back into the pillow, obviously telling us to take care of it ourselves.

No way was I going to kill that spider, and I knew for a fact that Alice wouldn't go near it again. So, I decided to take matters into my own hands.

"Edward?" I didn't mind being quite. He should be up soon anyway. Who needs soft voices, right? "Come and be a man and kill the spider for us!"

I smiled, hoping to lift the mood, and spirit, of things, in hope of him actually moving.

He opened his eyes and looked at me by the doorway. He looks so cute when he's sleepy.

Damnit Bella, we're in the middle of a crisis here. Head in the game.

Long story short, Edward was a lost cause. Instead Emmett had finally decided to make himself useful. At the world(s) 'be a man' came into context, he jumped up straight away.

"I'll be a man," Emmett said, puffing out his chest and deepening his voice. Walking through the door and towards the spider, Alice and I waited for his return. Emmett would make it all better.

"You are no man, Edward!" I hissed towards him, but he seemed to be asleep, or close to it. Couldn't even get a comeback.

We heard a shriek and loud, running footsteps coming our way.

"It's huge!" He said as he ran through the door towards his bed. "Why didn't you warn me!"

"What!?" Alice and I said at the same time, watching Emmett closely. "You're no man either!"

"Just because I'm an big guy doesn't mean that I'm not scared of spiders!" He exclaimed. "That is _such _a stereotype!"

We couldn't believe it. Big, tough Emmett was scared of something 100 times smaller than himself. Emmett.

We stood looking at him for a moment, hands on our hips, trying to register what we had just seen. This would make a _huge _dent on his ego, had it might slip out. Who cares about stereotypes? They were all true nowadays.

"You have got to be kidding me." Alice muttered as she paced in front of the door. Turning to me she pointed her finger in the air as if she had a great idea, "We need bug spray!"

"Yes!" I clicked my finger as I realised she was right.

"I'll be right back. I'll get some from the kitchen." And she ran off.

"Get off the bed and stop being a wimp Emmett." I looked at him after Alice had left. Poor boy.

Alice was back in a matter of minutes, with a very serious face. "Umm, Alice?" I looked at her cautiously. "Why did you have bug spray in your kitchen?" I asked confused. "That seems kind of unhygienic."

"It was under the sink Bella, where we keep all of our cleaning products and stuff." She answered.

"Ok, that's fine then." I nodded. "Now, let's get that spider!"

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**15 Minutes and a can of bug spray later...**

"Do you think its dead?" I said looking from the spider to Alice and back again.

"I think," She nodded. "Come on."

Emmett of still awake when we got back, but I think Edward had finally fallen asleep. He wasn't moving a muscle and we come hear soft snores coming from him.

"Is it dead?" Emmett asked as soon as we were through the door.

"It is actually." Alice piped up. "Thanks for helping. You're a _real _man."

Alice was really enjoying this. "I can't wait for Rose to hear about this." She snickered. "She'll never see you the same again."

Emmett's face turned red, which we could still see in the bleak darkness. "You won't say a word, okay?"

"Sure Emmett whatever you sa –" Alice was interrupted by a loud snore coming from Edward.

We all turned to look at him and laughed as he moved around. Watching people sleep was more fun than you would think.

After about two minutes we were sick of the snoring, so we surrounded Edward on the bed and looked at him, not sure what to do next.

"What do you think we should do?" I asked. "It's kind of getting annoying."

Both of them shrugged and looked at Edward, considering what they should do.

"What do you think would happen if I did, this..?" Emmett suggested, quietly as he poked Edwards nose on the tip.

And the snoring stopped!

"Cool." Alice said, leaning forward. Like I said, she was really enjoying all this.

We waited a while, just enjoying the silence and laughing as we did.

"Do you think he stopped breathing?" Alarm crossed my face as we came to realisation of what we might have done.

"Good one Emmett, you killed my brother!" Alice said, not bothering to control her voice any more.

"He's my brother too, you know!" Emmett said back, not quite as loud. He was trying to keep his calm.

I just watched.

"Well not anymore! You killed him!"

Alice was worried about what they had done. "Poke his nose again, see if anything happens!" She commanded Emmett to do.

And the snoring started again.

Everyone sighed, glad that we had not killed anyone. "Thank goodness." I said. "That was close."

"You know what?" Said Alice. "I think we should go to bed. Too much drama for one night."

"Good idea," Emmett agreed. I liked that idea too.

"Agreed. " I murmured as I turned over, back to sleep again. "Night, guys."

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**This was inspired by a real sleepover. The nose thing actually happened, and the spider thing! **

**Hope you liked it.**

**Please review.**


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